How to Move Out of Your Old Place Post-Breakup
"Moving" is routinely listed in the top ten "Most Stressful Life Experiences" (sometimes ranked higher than breakups or divorces). Regardless of what you are moving from, orchestrating a relocation can be an emotional and logistic challenge. Dominic LoBianco of Smartbox Moving and Storage is here with his best tips for making the transition more manageable.
Even in the best situations and circumstances, breakups, separations or divorce can often be a grueling emotional experience. From finding a place to stay to dealing with shared accounts and other assets, those who are caught flat-footed by an unexpected breakup may easily find themselves feeling lost and overwhelmed. Creating a plan and staying focused on what's important can help to minimize drama and allow you to avoid unnecessary conflict. While moving out of your old place may be painful, doing so as quickly as possible can help you to protect yourself, both financially and emotionally.
Create a Plan
No one who has just suffered a breakup wants to deal with issues like truck rental and apartment leasing applications, but it is often best for everyone involved to expedite that process. Physical separation can help you begin recovery and relaunching your new life. A swift move is even more important in situations where your ex has become antagonistic and/or cohabitation is no longer tenable. An effective plan should cover finding a safe, comfortable place to stay.
Finding Temporary Solutions
When trying to move out following a breakup, it is often best to concentrate on finding immediate solutions rather than seeking out perfect ones. Better options, alternatives, and long-term arrangements can be made later, once your situation is stable. You can store your things temporarily, either with a friend/family or in a commercial storage facility. For residency, a friend's couch, a short-term sublet, a co-living space, or even a temporary Airbnb or hotel reservation may be flexible options where furnishings and many creature comforts are provided for (e.g. wifi, utilities). While you are settling in a temporary solution, you can start to investigate long-term leases as well, as well as gather the items you might need for your new place.
Protecting Yourself and Your Interests
It is always a good idea to protect yourself financially following a breakup. Honoring any existing financial commitments and ensuring that shared accounts are dealt with quickly will alleviate headaches down the road. Other issues that may need to be dealt with at the earliest opportunity typically include:
● Changing passwords and log-in information on all accounts
● Removing yourself (and potential liability) from any shared leases that you aren't continuing
● Canceling any utilities, deliveries, and/or services at your old place
● Updating your address on bank accounts, subscriptions, retirement plans
● Discussing division of any shared assets, property, and ongoing mutual responsibilities (potentially engaging an attorney)
While it may be tempting to battle it out with your ex, fights and arguments may amount to little more than wasted energy. When possible, try to move in a single day and identify a time when your ex will be out of the home to avoid additional conflict. And reminder, you don’t need to do this alone. Working with Onward, hiring a professional moving company, or recruiting friends/family can make the harrowing process of relocation less stressful. Further, reminding yourself that on the other side of this move there is a new life awaiting you can help reframe the emotionally and logistically challenging experience.
For more on SmartBox Moving and Storage Solutions, visit them here.